It’s my agent’s fault, she first showed me Ipad’s lovely features: the bookshelf, the possibilities of easy editing, the ever-so-neat- general-gadgetiness of it. She fanned the embers of a quietly smouldering interest into a full-on burning passion. There were, however, one or two things she neglected to mention, that she might have pointed out before I went full steam ahead and married my own Ipad.
In the beginning it was wonderful. Ipad turned those spare minutes sitting around at swimming/ballet/cricket/fencing/other myriad things my children require collecting from, into something useful.
When the child bell rang, I could easily transfer my manuscript from PC to Ipad and take it with me. I could write and edit everywhere without having to lug my laptop around. And the battery life, Oh the battery life was fantastic. We were so compatible, I was getting heaps of writing done in previously wasted time:
I could catch up on reading:
For two weeks we had a wonderful working honeymoon. I cancelled my micro-sim so I we could be alone together, we didn’t need the internet when we were out, we just needed each other.
And then came the changes.
It started to control me. I found myself unable to leave the house without it – a new routine was established – Keys, Phone, Purse, Ipad…I had to have it with me at all times.
It started watching what I drink:
Keeping records of my thoughts:
It informed my daily take on the news:
And then it came, the ultimate betrayal.
I was lost.
My good intentions shattered.
Ipad gave me Angry Birds.
Our once perfect relationship spiralled into a downturn of game playing, of obsession.
Our time together became a sordid thing. Oh, I can’t deny there was a thrill to be had, but afterwards, the shame, the shame….
I briefly considered re-installing the micro-sim, so we could go out together and watch the stars, but I could see it was just a pathetic attempt to rekindle the clean living of our early days.
I want our relationship to be healthy again. I want us to be writing, editing, but Ipad’s heart isn’t in it and I’m not sure I have the strength to do it alone…some of the bad green piggies on Angry Birds have got orange moustaches… some one needs to deal with them…help me someone….help me…